Many people have theorized about the fundamental needs of humanity. I believe that a deep sense of purpose is one of those needs. I see, however, that most people are looking in the wrong place to find this purpose, resulting in a never ending cycle of attempts and disappointments to find what they really want.
People generally think about “purpose” as a service they offer themselves or the world. The word has an active feel to it, and thus it can become less about who you are and more about what you are doing. The natural next step is to relate this to your vocation or way of carrying yourself in the world. Then we look around at the vocations or external impressions of others to see what their purpose is. Purpose becomes this “thing” that we evaluate in others and compare ourselves to. We think, “Wow, Mary’s purpose is to be a devoted mother and maybe if I had kids then I would feel that same sense of purpose.” Or, “Steve is on such a mission to build his business to do what he loves. Perhaps I should become an entrepreneur as well!” Or an even sneakier one, “Wow, John is so happy all the time. He must be really connected to his purpose.”
I’m not saying there is anything wrong with deriving inspiration from others. However, what easily happens is that we get lost in a value comparison with those around us. The fundamental search for purpose in our lives becomes a way of judging ourselves. We may feel like we haven’t achieved our true potential or found the “thing” we are meant to be doing with our lives—which usually makes us feel bad about ourselves.
Suddenly this fundamental search for purpose becomes a way to derive personal worth. You think, “If I’m not doing as much as this other person, then I’m not valuable.” You may conveniently forget that all of this is based upon stories of others that you’ve made up in your mind.
What is the more effective and enjoyable alternative? First, do not look outside of yourself to fulfill your desire for purpose. The search for your life purpose is by definition very intimate and individual to you. Looking for your purpose by guessing the purpose of others has its place temporarily, but then becomes the cause of great suffering. Second, passionately pursue your own knowing of your inherent worth. Your value does not come from what you do. It is not related to your success, failure, or contribution to the world. Your value exists because you exist. Your true nature itself is more worthy of love and reverence than you will ever understand on a logical level. So own it! Own how amazing and valuable you are without doing anything, because then, your search for purpose in your life becomes a different conversation. With the knowledge that you are inherently valuable, the search for your life purpose turns toward more intriguing questions, “What is the reason I am alive?” “What can I give?” “What is already here?” “Who am I?”
Do you know your inherent value? Do you know how to explore within to discover your intimate life purpose? Check out my Week 1 Video and contact me directly for a free conversation of discovery!